Mr And Mrs Sniff

Late one evening, my better half says, "Hey, I forgot to tell you. One of my colleagues and his wife may drop in later for a coffee." I don't know the guy, but, no problem. Friends often drop in unexpectedly at our place, so that's fine.
We are both wrapped up in our respective books when the doorbell rings. She sniffles as soon as she steps into the living room. "I smell a rose, please, throw it out. I'm allergic to roses." Heck, I can't throw it out. It's attached to the stem of one of my prized rosebushes. But I do ask the better half to temporarily shift it to the far corner of the terrace.
She is a schoolteacher, I find out. (Some poor kids must be traumatized for life!) "Children these days are so precocious, you know. When I was in school..." I kind of tune out a little after that. I'm thinking of my rosebush out in the cold.
Would they like to have some snacks, I ask. There's this delicious thing I bought from Indore. "Only if it's not made from gram flour. My husband gets this reaction, you know. Itching and stuff." Eeyuck. How about a slice of cake instead? "Eggless, right?" Right!
After the (thankfully eggless) cake (she prefers pineapple,actually) she gets up to wash her hands. In 2 seconds flat she's outta the loo, a finger daintily tucked under the tip of her nose. "Tch, sandalwood freshner makes me sneeze. Got out in time." Well, she can use the loo in the master bedroom. No, wait, it has a rose air freshner. Ok, the one in my office upstairs. That one, has a lemon scented freshner. Will that make her disappear? No, unfortunately not.
Time for coffee to wash down the cake. "None for me, actually. It keeps me awake all night, you know". Hot chocolate, I offer. Host's duty and all that righteous crap. "Oh, that will be fine."
One sip and she says, "Full fat milk, huh? Tastes good. But you really ought to switch to low fat, cow's milk, you know. Low cholestrol, much healthier."
Much later, that night, the better half quizzes me, "Was that really an accident?"
I turn to him with wide, innocent eyes and say, "Why, honey, I genuinely caught my toe on a thread in the carpet. Do you think I'd purposely hit a guest on the head with a tray?"

A Sparrow’s Wedding and 21 Cheerleaders.

A sparrow gets married in an arbor of flowers in the jungle. The guests include parrots, squirrels, rabbits and deer and peacocks and a lot of other animals. That, was the theme of one of my drawings. Cut me a little slack, ok, considering that I was only 8 years old at the time.
Apparently, the judges of the competition found the drawing cute. The prize distribution ceremony was to be held in a big auditorium and every child who won was given 2 passes so the parents could attend. I suppose other guests had to buy the tickets. How many people do you think went with me to the ceremony? That’s a good guess. The afore-mentioned 21!
My parents, 1 set of grandparents, 1 great uncle, 1 great aunt, 3 uncles and 2 aunts with their respective spouses, and 5 assorted cousins.
When I went onstage, the uncles whistled, all 5 cousins yelled while the women in our group sniffled. Did I mention I got a silver medal? Along with approximately 30-40 others who also got silver medals? The only thing that set me apart was this huge personal cheerleading squad that went with me. If I had been older, I would probably have cringed with embarrassment. Thankfully, I wasn’t!
I no longer remember where I put the medal. I suppose the certificate must also be lying around somewhere. What’s never left me is that warm glow of affection. I was a princess, surrounded by so many loyal admirers.
Thank God, for loved ones who help make molehills out of mountains of difficulties, and mountains out of molehills of happiness!